Diana Powell Lukoff

LAST DAY, 1966

Daddy, I don't want to live anymore.

The desert zooms by
in a blur.
Lizards and sand;
red rocks understand.
I wish I were out there
I wish I were a star
Far, far, far
I wish I were a tree
on Mars
I wish I knew
How to make you
stop.
I'm sorry
I can't die on cue.
But Daddy
this is for you:
I don't want to live anymore.

I wish I were out there.
The red rocks understand
And want to help me;
Lizards in the sand
want me to be free.

I wish I were out there
With the lizards and the sand;
the red rocks understand
and want to help me:
Look at them so far away,
wind-smooth and sun-warm.
A swarm
of locusts would descend
to be my friends
And I would be king
of us all, and
a quiet rain
would start to fall.
We'd get in a cave
and play charades
until dawn.

Just drop me off, Daddy;
I promise I won't tell.
I'll be a nice king
all the rest of my days
with the lizards and the locusts in the haze.


Diana reads "Last Day, 1966":



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Diana confesses: "This poem is based on the death of Jeffrey Fouquet, abused by his parents, Ronald and Betty Lansdown Fouquet. I learned of the Fouquets from a Joan Didion essay that mentions a crime they committed against another of their children."

DIANA POWELL LUKOFF, originally from Memphis, Tennessee, worked as a copy editor at The Commercial Appeal before moving to Bellingham, Washington in 2005 to work as an AmeriCorps reading tutor. She lives in Bellingham with her husband and dog.